Monday, June 4, 2012

"Rock Me Baby" by David Cassidy (1973)

View the Premise & Ground Rules for Revisiting Vinyl. 

Fun Fact: I think this wins the award for the most pretentious cover coupled with the most vacuous material.

Filed Between: Rosanne Cash and The Chambers Brothers

Obtained Via: Chicken Coop!

My Overall Rating of the Tracks Separately:
Don't bother.  Seriously, don't bother.

I'm not gonna lie.  I listened to "Master of Reality" instead of playing this thing for a second time.  And I'm glad I did because "Rock Me Baby" has no merit - it never even attempts or pretends to.  It's just a cash-in on a name.

This LP fills a very unique niche.  It represents people who are often famous solely because they are popular and popular only because they are famous.  Granted, David Cassidy already had a hit TV show, but let's be honest - his role was an attractive teen idol singing sensation.  Big stretch there.  I have watched this sleight of hand act play out at least fifty times and I still can't figure it out.

It starts with the individual who has somehow tapped into the vernacular of the here and now.  This person usually has no apparent skills or marketable product and really has no right whatsoever for being of note.  So the Hollywood spin doctors fill that vacuum by creating a product specifically to represent what somebody can do - who would be of no interest whatsoever otherwise.  I call this phenomenon "micro-pop" because it doesn't even follow the regular tropes of pop music; it's totally a get-it-while-the-getting-is-good-and-don't-let-the-door-hit-you-on-the-way-out mentality.  Micro-pop is the ultimate unadulterated, unapologetic cash-in.

Case in point, when's the last time you heard Stars Are Blind by Paris Hilton?  Had you forgotten that song even existed?  How many times do you expect you'll ever hear it again?  And it's actually not a bad pop song.  But it's micro-pop.

It served its purpose and made it money, and then was lost to the annals of time - unless it happens to get left in a chicken coop for almost forty years, only to be rediscovered by a guy with a random number generator who has to write about it for his blog.  But otherwise, it's that whole "lost to the annals of time" thing.

So, is it an album?  Seriously?!  No, it sooooo isn't.

Up next, "Montana Cafe" by Hank Williams Jr.

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